10 tips that will make everybody sleep better

sleep sheepIt’s estimated that an average 80 year old man sleeps 25 years, just under one third of his life. There is no satisfying answer to why the human organism needs to disconnect from reality during sleep, but one thing’s for sure: it’s one of the most important stages of our lives, often neglected, and responsable directly for your quality of life. Many people still don’t understand and appreciate the benefits of sleeping and ignore the hazards of losing sleep. If you want to find out more about it, read this. Here are some tips that if respected, will make you sleep better, rejuvenate and feel better every single day.

Do the same sleep ritual every time.

There is still much left to understand about the human brain, but scientists pointed out that it prefers working after the same general scheme. Any significant change in the scenario turns into a minor brain alarm that sends out stress signals throughout the body, possibly leading to insomnia. Do the same thing on weekends too.

Go to sleep and wake up at approximately the same time

Of course, the odds are life will put out obstacles in your way and it won’t allow you to stick to your program on some days. The point is not to lose your balance and keep going with your waking hour. Also, when you go to bed, don’t try to force yourself to sleep.

Make the right conditions in the bedroom.

Each of us have our own preferences when it comes to our room. If your a very tidy person having a cluttered room may be keeping you from going to sleep, despite the fact that you may not even realize this. But for most people, having your room clean is not a must. The colour of your walls does have a big impact on you. While having a bright orange will help your creativity, it won’t be so good when trying to sleep, so you really should use some soothing colours such as a light blue or sage green. Your bedroom should be anything but hot, and it should also be quiet and dark. Your bed and pillow should be very comfortable and large enough for you. Also, according to some recent studies, if you do errands on the bed (such as writing or studying), your brain associates it with something else than rest, and you may have problems going to sleep. The room has to be ventilated properly.

Don’t ignore the morning routine.

I’ve written a whole lot about this topic here, you really should check it out.

Don’t eat or drink large amounts before sleeping.

If you have a light dinner, it can be up to 2-3 hours before going to bed. However, if you eat more at dinner (which is not a good thing in itself) it should be 4 hours earlier. You should also be careful what you eat, don’t make it something that will upset your stomach.

Give up unhealthy habits.

Drinking coffee or soda or alcoholic beverages. The drinks are all stimulants (even alcohol) and they require quite a while to get out of your system; and about smoking… I’m not even gonna go into that. Quit smoking!! It’s really not that hard.

Exercise.

Exercising does wonders for you in a whole number of ways, and let’s be honest, it’s not that hard to do. Whether you go to your local gym, go out for a jog or a swim, a few hours a week is a small price to pay when it comes down to your health. It also makes your sleep more restful but you have to be careful not to exercise for three hours (some say six hours) before going to bed, otherwise it could mess with your body.

Short naps are good, long ones are not.

We did a more detailed post about napping here, so check out the details there, but keep in mind that if you sleep a lot during the day, you’ll find it harder and harder to sleep early at night.

Use pills only as a last resort.

Unfortunately, it’s getting easier and easier to get some sleeping pills, and many people abuse that. If you find it hard to sleep, you first need to think positive, and don’t get the ‘I have insomnia’ idea in your head, because it will be hard to take out from there. If you can’t sleep for more than half an hour, you become pretty stressed about not being able to sleep so it’s better if you do something relaxing, read or listen to some calm music. Think positive thoughts; you’ve worked for a whole day and still have energy and can’t go to sleep, I’ll just compensate tomorrow and stick to a schedule.

Let go of your stress and worries.

I have my own ritual: almost everytime I go to sleep, I ponder of the day that has passed, with the good and the bad, thinking what I could have done differently, understand how I can do better, but I don’t let it affect me. After I do that, it’s much easier to go to sleep, having found peace with myself and letting go of all the stress. Find your inner balance and let go of your thoughts after that.

I can’t stress the issue of proper sleep enough, but hopefully by now, you’re beginning to understand just what a big mistake neglecting it is and the major consequences it can have. Just following these small steps can have a huge benefic impact on you, and they require a minimum of effort, if any at all.

Photo credits: 1,2, 3, 4

What to learn from the past

The past keeps haunting us whether we like it or not and we come across things that happened years and years ago in our grandparents’ stories, in more or less interesting history lessons or in our own memories. Sometimes we all feel that some things would have better been forgotten especially when we are criticized but some other times we find many good examples while looking back.

So, does history always tend to repeat or it just teaches us some lessons, and if it’s so what is it that we should learn?

  1. Family life

In the past (more or less distant) children were supposed to obey their parents totally, many times because of fear and over-imposed respect. They had the main decisional role in their life until they got married and even after that. Parents were many times the ones to decide who their children were going to marry, and their word was more important than the bride’s or the groom’s.

Does it look grim? Indeed, we could find some of these not quite acceptable now. However, there are a lot of things that today’s family has lost. Even though relations between children and parents are no longer based on a nearly-religious fear they are tensed because the notion of respect has solely remained a notion. And how about the family itself? How long is it since you’ve seen your uncle, cousins or grandparents? If you’re among the lucky ones it’s been a few days or maybe weeks, but in many cases years pass before relatives see each other. Families don’t even eat together now.

What to learn?

What we have now is more ways of communication. This should allow us to return at least a bit to the extended family that used to exist in the past. The modern man needs affection maybe more than before because of the fast-pacing life we have now and keeping relatives at distance will surely bring many disadvantages. So grab your phone at birthdays or on the holidays period or at least send a few e-cards!

We have the possibility of making our own decisions now. But are we doing this correctly? Many of us refuse any kind of advice or warning related to our personal life, friends, money or education, many times leading to unpleasant repercussions. Listening to advice was something the young people in the past used to do much more than we do, this also being a proof of respect. Don’t you think we need more of that now?

What we all should know is that no matter how much we evolve and what new inventions we come up with, family will remain a centre around which we gravitate and we should never forget who we are and were we come from.

  1. Work

Work has changed a great deal in the last years as machines have replaced handwork and computers have become almost impossible to live without. Work used to be quite unpleasant in the past as there were endless work hours every week without help and usually in harsh conditions. Education was accessible to only the privileged so the others had few chances of reaching far. Many of us would certainly have trouble adjusting to such conditions.

So, is there anything to learn from these spine-chilling descriptions of work in the past?

The answer is yes.

At that time people could not afford to waste time doing nothing or just gossiping. Work was hard, families had to be fed, so they were rather more interested in making their work easier.

So you should be at least a bit thankful for the work you do now even if you could do better. Stop listening to all nonsense and little office conspiracies. It would be absolutely great if people used their energy in order to create and no to destroy.

Life is much more than the new convertible your boss bought or the fur coat you saw yesterday (they do terrible things to animals to make that coat anyway so it would be better if it stayed in the shop). Learn to enjoy what you have, to set a goal, to be kinder to your workmates and count your blessings at least from time to time.

  1. Spirituality

Our ancestors used to go to church every holiday and all their life was practically based on their religion on a way or another. Wars were started, rulers were born, lives were taken, all starting from people’s beliefs. Everything was a sign, obedience was demanded.

Since the deeply-religious times the world has changed and science has begun to be more and more important and less regarded as a blasphemy. Religion is still highly-priced and most of the planet embraces a religion in a way or another. But have we lost our peace?

What to do?

Nowadays everyone has a choice: whether or not to believe and if the answer is yes how much to involve. Even though we see religion taken way too far every day we turn on the TV, prayers or some kind of spiritual activity is known to have a positive effect on one’s mental health and stress level.

Even though our ancestors would not ask many questions and even created the Inquisition, they had some very good values which governed their conduct.

Many of those tend to fade nowadays, so a little meditation and check on our behavior would do nothing but good.

Believer or not, everyone needs some time to ask themselves some questions and to set a goal, other than buying a new house or seeing the boss fired.

So, the past can definitely teach us how not to repeat some mistakes and how to use what we have now as best as we can. Making a new mistake will teach us more than repeating the old ones.

The lost art of avoiding and handling conflicts

Our relations with the others seem to do nothing but to make our existence complicated and stressful. We all must admit we are practically fighting over the most meaningless things in the world as negotiation seems to have become a lost art. However hard it is, you should learn that it is better to give up sometimes and that you may not always be right.

But, if a conflict still occurs remember that the best way to solve is through empathy. Imagine you are in the other’s position and decide whether it is worth or not to go on discussing the issue. Take the others’ arguments into consideration too and you will manage to handle every kind of situation easily.

At work- a lot of conflicts are caused by one’s job as there are a lot of factors which, combined with the high level of stress lead to strong disagreements from time to time. So what do you do when someone tries to get your post or if you are overlooked for promotion no matter how much you have worked? Definitely, the first thing that comes into your mind is to go and tell a couple of things to them. However, as long as the other’s actions do not affect you there is not point in doing that; you can also compromise your position by starting a fight at work. What you can do is to have a very relaxed attitude, do your best at work and show everyone that that job is yours to keep. By showing not to care at all about anything negative happening around you will gain points and look more professional.

If your boss is the problem and you think his treatment is unfair towards you or others you have every right in the world to complain. However, be sure that you can support your accusations and that you can point out on some real problems. Be calm and don’t forget that your boss is still an authority! In more serious cases you can ask for advice from a lawyer to be sure that you do the right thing.

And if someone broke your favorite cup or spoilt the perfect order of your files don’t make a fuss about it! That person probably feels bad enough about it! One simple discussion should be enough. As about gossip, don’t let that get to you. Comments are part of every successful person’s life.

At home – one’s home should be a peaceful place to relax. However fights occur very often in most families as gathered stress from work, frustrations and insufficient time spent together can easily make someone lose their temper. Family conflicts are very hard to handle many times as they are not always based on rational reasons and strong feelings and suffering are involved. So what should you do?

Parents and children: the generation gap has always brought a whole lot of discussions whether about music, lifestyle or friends. What you should know is that your parents only want the best for you, so, even if they may seem a little (or extremely) exaggerated don’t make a tragedy out of it. Of course, nobody likes to be told what friends to have or who to go out with but before starting to shout, think it over. They may be right as they can see things you just don’t. And if they are just trying to protect you, discuss calmly and explain your reasons for making a certain choice ( even though a huge tattoo on your arm may not be very easy to explain). Accept compromise even if you don’t like it. Prove to them that you can be responsible and you can think for yourself and most important, don’t offend them or tell unpleasant things. You will regret it later!

Couple affairs: when it comes to couples, matters become even more complicated as one’s feelings can be hurt in many different ways. Shouting, accusing and threatening about you moving back with your mother will not help a relationship but will destroy it. A relationship should always be built on trust and respect so this is why two people should be able to discuss practically every subject without being embarrassed or afraid. Making some time for each other should solve most of the problems, but when having to face others again do your best not to hurt the other. Angry words said during a fight can leave wounds that are hard to heal. So think why your partner might be mad and don’t decide from the start that you are right. Listen and don’t make sudden decisions as regrets will be useless later.

Everywhere – we see people fighting in shops, hotels, in the parking lot, on the street; even if they do not know each other they find a reason or another to start a conflict. Of course, there are a lot of people who show no respect or who lack in experience so they are totally incapable to have a post. What is annoying is that these people appear when you need them the least. But, even if you look at the incompetent clerk in front of you and feel like just hitting him with your umbrella, take a deep breath, be polite and wait. You may be just as annoying in some cases (OK, maybe not as much) and you would not enjoy such behavior. And then, by being calm and respectful you will not make things even harder then they already are!

So, even though many times it’s terribly hard to resist the temptation of just hitting someone remember that there are better solutions for avoiding and managing a conflict. Make your life and the others’ simple and pleasant!

8 ways to show that you love yourself

We all want to be happy and we all are ready to do just about anything to reach this goal. We study, we work, we travel, we try to make a change. However, most of us forget the most important thing: it’s not all about having a lot of money or going to the most luxurious resorts, it’s about loving yourself. So, when was the last time you thought about that?

First of all, take care of your body. Diseases can bring quite a lot of suffering no to mention the psychological impact they have on you! Take care of yourself and of your aspect too; when you look good, you feel good!

Eat healthily! Diets are recommended when you have a health problem; if you don’t have one, don’t push your body to the limits just to look like one of the supermodels you’ve seen on TV. You don’t have to fit the patterns of a kind of beauty you almost never see on the street! Learn to appreciate who you are as it’s impossible not to have qualities worth to appreciate. Of course, try not to choose the opposite and eat all the fast food you can get! Eat more vegetable, less sweets and burgers and try to avoid alcohol. Anyway, allow yourself small treats from time to time. Learn to create a balance.

Exercise! Physical activity should not be as scary as it seems to most people. In fact it can prove to be one of the most pleasant activities. You can choose to go to a gym to work out or, if your schedule does not allow it, you can find some time in the weekends to go for a run in the park while listening to your favourite music, take a long walk or play some basketball with your friends. Team sports allow you to socialize, have a lot of fun and even meet some new people. So when there are so many advantages it would be a shame to let it slip!

Take care of your health! Nowadays, our health is jeopardized by many factors so seeing a GP from time to time becomes a must. Have your heart, lungs and blood pressure checked, ask for some advice, learn about what you can do to improve your lifestyle. You don’t have to be afraid about a deadly disease being discovered every time you enter a hospital, it’s just a safety measure.

The way you behave can also tell a lot of things about how much you care about yourself. So make a few changes to change your general state of mind and to feel good everyday!

Have a good opinion about yourself You should never feel that the others are so much better than you at practically everything you try to do. Everyone has his or her own weak points, but these are the ones to define us. So don’t be afraid to show who you are even if it doesn’t work perfectly every time. Learn something from every mistake and do not give up. And the most important thing, never allow anyone to look down on you. Money, a special social status or a good job do not make you a better person! The world we live in makes us be more and more competitive and forces people to break any boundary. However, this should not make you feel inferior to anyone or unable to succeed. Give yourself another chance!

Find more time for your hobbies! A hobby is something you practically lose yourself into and defines your personality. No matter what it is, from collecting stamps to bungee-jumping, you should try and find more time for your hobby. If you feel like you don’t have something to give you so much satisfaction maybe it’s time to find that thing that can change your day from a boring one to the best day ever! How about dancing? It can prove to be a great substitute for working out and it’s fun to do. Moreover, everyone will be impressed at a party by your moves. Have you read a good book recently? Maybe it’s high time you should rediscover your passion for reading!

Don’t push yourself too far! Many sleepless nights at work, a whole “mountain” of reports on your desk, you haven’t gone out for quite some time…does that describe you? Think about your real purpose for doing all these. Does that make you happy or you just feel that you look like a zombie every morning? Think about your priorities and take a break if you need one and remember that life is not just about work.

Spend some time alone! No one asks you to suddenly become antisocial, it’s just a necessity even for the most sociable people. Life tends to become faster and faster and when so many things happen in just one day you definitely need some time to think them over. Find even a few minutes everyday to enjoy the silence of your home and to find strategies for the future or just to remember some good moments. This will help you be more relaxed and to find solutions faster.

And in the end, allow yourself something you’ve wanted for a long time. Whether it is your birthday, Christmas or any special occasion, buy something you’ve wanted for a long time and which makes you really happy even if it doesn’t have too much of a practical value. Of course, you should not put a mortgage on your apartment to buy a 50000 $ watch, just allow yourself something to bring you joy!

In the end it’s not so hard to have a better life and to rediscover yourself. Change your habits, take care of your body and your spirit too and don’t forget to smile when you look in the mirror!

A few things to learn from Don Quixote

He may be one of the most famous characters of all times. He fascinated generations and generations of readers with his extraordinary adventures which existed only in his mind. But who was Don Quixote after all? A skinny old man with a rather peculiar view of the world (just not to call him a little mad). But maybe these characteristics allow him to give us some valuable lessons of life, lessons about being ourselves after all!

Don’t be afraid to be a little different…or maybe more. Don Quixote went out in the world wearing something that looked like an armor and riding maybe the funniest-looking horse in history. He was immune to anything the others would say and to their mockery as he had a goal to reach- to be the best knight ever. There is of course a huge difference between being different and being silly. However, in this uniform world where everyone acts following the same pattern and cares about the same fashions the ones who break the barriers may be the losers but are definitely the ones to remain in history. Don’t break the rules just to show you are tough or a badass, try to break the thought rules, try to change the world to suit you and not to adapt totally to something that does not represent you!

Have some strong values! Don Quixote would fight an army for his beloved one even if he had never seen her. Being faithful and fighting in her name was what interested him most and no matter what beautiful ladies he met, he never ceased to talk about her beauty. Our knight was also in pursuit of justice and could not see people suffering. He even attacks some dolls during an improvised show in order to make justice in the story.

Someone with a strong personality should always find some values to believe in even if he or she takes them from religion, moral law or just from their soul. It’s a matter of making good decisions and treating the others correctly. Unfortunately we cannot be superheroes even if there are a lot of villains everywhere around us. However, every little thing we do can change the world.

Don’t forget about your innocence! Don Quixote lived like a child seeing things just the way children do when playing. A flock of sheep was a great army, some windmills were terrible giants. An ugly servant girl with not so great moral values was one of the noblest ladies. So why not do something similar? Try to see the beauty and the good aspects of everything, try to become so optimistic that your friends will get mad! (Ok, maybe not that much). Transform your dull life by firstly working at your mind’s level. Life was not meant to be dull, we make it like that, so go to parks, to funfairs, take a ride in a rollercoaster, go run with some friends and have a leaf fight! Have a hot coco in the evenings and watch a children’s movie especially as the ones made nowadays are some truly something. Don’t be ashamed and don’t hide your inner child! We all miss being talked off for entering the house dirty.

Rediscover literature (if you haven’t already). Don Quixote did not have many possibilities to read but he took advantage of everything he could find spending his entire fortune on volumes filled with the adventures of the greatest knights in the world.

Nowadays we have so many possibilities to enjoy literature that one can hardly resist. Nothing stimulates language development and imagination like reading does. Live with your favorite heroes, hold your breath when something bad happens to them and enjoy the end of a good book. Reading can help you see the world in another way as it shows you how others great thinkers used to see it before you. Fly to places you’ve never been before and strengthen your mind. This is how great ideas can come to your mind and proves to be one of the best pastimes ever invented by people. Get to know Don Quixote right from the source!

Don’t let failure discourage you! When Don Quixote was defeated by another knight returned home saddened but no matter what happened he did not give up. One time he even decided to make a switch of plans and thought about becoming a shepherd together with his friend Sancho Panza. Until his end he kept his attitude positive.

So this is why you should remember that no matter how tough life can get there are always solutions and something good will happen in the end. If you feel like you’ve lost your direction then maybe there is another way. It’s just like Columbus did: when asked to place an egg in balance on a knife’s blade he hit it to it, thus cracking it. However, it was balanced. Maybe the solution to your problem is near. Or maybe a dramatic change is needed. Think it over: if being a shepherd brings your happiness then do it!

So in the end what do we have? A book, a man, a legend and a whole lot to learn from it.

Decisive choices: the college that suits you

When going to college you know that you are choosing, in most cases, your future career. It’s a most important choice and not at all easy to make. But shouldn’t you find what you like and are good at and go there? Had it only been that simple…

In USA a large number of students spend many years going to different courses before actually choosing their major as they can simply not find the answers to the questions mentioned above. But can this process be skipped? The answer is YES, especially as no one likes to waste time and money.

The future career- when we were little, we all wanted to be doctors, astronauts and singers. In time our options can get to change dramatically, but in the end everybody has to make a choice. For those who want to get a college degree it is better to be decided before actually choosing what to study next. This is definitely not a matter of probabilities! Think about your aptitudes, interests, the kind of job you want (active or more office or computer work) and very important, about how much you will be paid. Also take into consideration factors such as your health, the possibility to work abroad or in another region of your country and whether your future job will affect your possibility to start your own family. Already have some ideas?

The natural talent- For some, the decision is quite simple. There are definitely some of you who have made a religion out of a subject, who have some specials aptitudes such as working with children or web designing, or who are very talented when it comes to some type of art. When having such a gift it is quite easy to make a choice and can consider yourself to be quite lucky. But, in some cases your future job may not be considered as useful or well-paid as others and some may want to convince you to give up your dream. Carefully consider all pieces of advice before deciding as stubbornness will not help you. Still, in most cases, it’s better to do what you like and to continue your studies thinking about how much you worked and studied in a certain domain; it’s not all about money! You don’t want to become a psychiatrist’s most important client, do you?

Information is power! Learn everything you can about possible future colleges for you to study at. Browse their sites, brochures and better than that, if possible, try to go and assess the situation yourself. Get informed about teachers, study conditions, career prospects and also about how much would all cost you as that also proves to be important. Does it suit you? Could it be what you were looking for? However, it is best to get behind the scenes.Talk to students (it’s even better if you already have some friends there) and find out if the advertisements really present reality. Have the graduates found good jobs? Are the courses interesting? Is it all worth? Students tend to be really frank about these subjects but be careful about who you ask. Some may just be unable to get to a certain level and blame it all on the university.

Ask for an opinion- parents, friends, teachers, classmates, they can all influence you quite a lot when making your decision. Doing everything on your own can sound quite tempting but in reality it’s better to know other views just as well. All parents want the best for their children, but of course, they can overreact. Inheriting the family’s chicken farm may not be what you want or maybe the idea of being a surgeon like your fathers scares you to death. However, maybe it’s not just mum that can’t understand my art, maybe I have no talent. Decide what is logical and what is just proof of affection in what your parents tell you, and don’t exclude them. Discuss and act like a real family!

Friends are also good to talk to as they will tell you sincerely that you should start thinking about something else as you could cut a person’s wrong foot as a doctor. If you’ve heard this some other time, maybe they have a point… They will also want to have you close, but don’t make a choice solely thinking about that. You will definitely make new friends and keeping in contact is piece of cake now!

You’d better not rely on people who heard about graduates making their living as taxi drivers or that you would have to pay enormous sums for passing your exams. Unfounded rumors are to be ignored when making a decision.

What to choose. Some universities are much better than others, but they may be too far from home, too expensive or in a city where you don’t know anyone. Should you choose one that has more benefits from these points of view or should you go to the top? Apply to both and also apply for a scholarship if you have good grades. If the top university accepts you and if you feel ready to face a great challenge and not only concerning study, try to go there. There are many jobs available for students and you may give it a try. However you cannot risk when money and your future career may be affected, so don’t be stubborn and don’t forget the fact that one can study in another university too if there’s enough good will.

So, in the end what is more to say than may you make the best choice!

How to be a lady

In the past women had quite a tough time because of all the things they were forbidden in order to be called a lady. Nowadays we no longer have to wear huge dresses, wigs and white gloves and are no longer afraid to remain alone in the same room with a man. Still, that doesn’t mean that there are no more rules to follow. Any woman knows that her every move is watched closely both by men and the other women. Of course, malicious comments are part of every successful person’s life. But some of them are justified, so why not make a few changes in order no to be tagged?

The first impression

It’s impossible for everyone to get to know you just the way you are and this is why creating a favorable impression from the first time you meet someone is very important. Build your image just the way you want it to be and explore. Use your imagination and create the style that suits you: elegant, natural, glamorous, it’s your choice. Your clothes should reflect your personality but should be appropriate for a certain situation (sorry, no t-shirts with your favorite band at work!). And there also some big DON’T’s:

wearing a huge cleavage at work or transparent blouses will create unpleasant situations and will not make the best impression ever. There are many possibilities like choosing other colours than white and black, or just some unusual designs. Choose that instead of making such an error.

Too much silver or golden fabric, glitter or all these combined is something that should really disappear. On some occasions they can definitely be taken into consideration, but not when going to do the groceries.

Too much love for rainbows: orange, yellow and green, not good on the same time. Colours are great, but when choosing what you want to wear be sure people will not look at you twice or make photos. It may not be for a fashion magazine.

Really tight clothes– it can be frustrating to try something on and see it’s not the most comfortable thing ever. Still, don’t be afraid to ask for a bigger size, feel good and look good at the same time as a blouse that seems ready to explode will not bring you many compliments. Don’t buy smaller clothes hoping that in time they will be just right. Choose what fits you!

-Heavy metal– three bracelets, a necklace with a big medallion a golden purse, a few rings and of course, golden shoes and earrings, maybe even a broche. Or maybe not. Accessories are usually worn to make the way you look more interesting not to reflect the sun so just choose a few. There is enough time to wear everything you have.

Is it a peacock? When choosing your make up try to keep it natural for work and usually during your daily activities. You can wear vibrating colours at parties or when going to clubs. Don’t give everyone a reason to giggle! In the end it’s a matter of respecting yourself. Demand for respect by acting the right way.

Behavior

A lady knows what to do in most situations, and if not she doesn’t make a tragedy out of everything and knows how to transforms any drawback into an advantage. This kind of woman knows when to attract attention and when to stay in shadow, masters the art of conversation and can easily handle a discussion. Does it look difficult? It’s not like that at all. It’s just a matter of will after all; of course, here are some more don’ts:

Have you heard that? Gossip: it’s there, everywhere, can’t fight it. And of course, talking about others is something we cannot avoid. However, discuss some things only with close friends or family members; if someone wants to share a secret than let it be a secret! Nothing can create a worse impression than talking behind everyone’s back!

You’re just saying that…! When receiving compliments don’t deny the fact, but accept them, smile and thank. A lady knows what her qualities are and is sure of herself.

What time is it? A lady will always arrive on time, no matter if it’s a business meeting, a movie night with friends or if she’s waiting for someone at the train station. You may be forgiven the first and maybe the second time but then the others will start to be annoyed by this habit. And then, it’s quite hard to find a very good excuse every time you are late for work!

-Let me tell you something… don’t shout on the street, laugh noisily and when you have to talk on the phone leave the group for a few moments. When going to a formal reunion, theatre, opera, turn off your phone in order not to interrupt everyone else. If you are not familiar with a subject, don’t just give your opinion without knowing the situation. It’s not a shame not to know everything! Saying this is much better than saying something really stupid that will make everyone look at each other ready to burst into laughter.

Thank God I got away from him! It’s not a very good idea to talk about your failed relationships and your partner’s defects with everyone. Keeping your private life private is good for both you and the others. Firstly, maybe not quite everyone is really interested in how your ex acted on dates and secondly you may not want to expose yourself very much. Explain the situation briefly and that should be enough.

How I hate her! In order to create a good image of yourself, try not to show all your feelings. When succeeding, show a moderate joy even if it’s the greatest thing ever.

When you feel envious (it happens) try not to show it. Don’t give satisfaction to others and don’t be rude. Don’t promote yourself aggressively, by handling the things the right way you will definitely attract the attention you deserve!

7 role models from the animal world

The shallowness of the world can bring discouragement and frustration to many. Not succeeding or just finding it difficult to have a purpose in life can easily bring you down. You’re looking for ideas. Most role models prove to be exactly the opposite of what they claim to be, so where is the key? Maybe looking just a little further may give you the necessary impulse. Discover new values within yourself!

1. ELEPHANT

Elephants are known to live in groups which are lead by an elder female. The babies are practically raised together with no discrimination and if one of them hurts his or her leg for example the whole group will walk slower with no complaints. Elephant families are also famous for adopting lost or orphan babies and especially for returning to their old cemeteries.

Family- Most of us consider it to be the most important value of all but not everyone actually takes this idea further. A stressful, time-consuming job, some new prospects, the lack of time, the competition… Family life has changed in the last years quite dramatically especially in the powerfully industrialized cities. Many young people even refuse to start their own family for the reasons mentioned above. But is it all worth the effort? Neglecting your family can have severe effects for everyone involved especially from a psychological point of view. With a little respect, affection and…time just for a short visit or a phone call you can get rid of depression, loneliness and sadness also bringing joy to the ones you care about. Also married people are known to live more and they are more likely to have a stable life. Give it a second thought! It’s not necessarily about legalizing but about offering and receiving affection!

2. DOG

Dogs can create remarkable bonds with their human masters which seem to pass beyond the instinct limit as many times dogs endangered their lives to save someone. There are numerous cases when faithful dogs returned to their owners after traveling hundreds and hundreds of miles or when the death of the master meant the end of the animal as well.

Friendship-next to family is considered one of the most important elements in one’s life as these relationships influence practically every life aspect: spare time, work, way of thinking, the choices to make. Investing in friendship is highly beneficial, of course when the other person does just the same. A lasting friendship brings the best out of someone as it involves deep affection, the unique opportunity to confide without a care, to receive advice from another point of view and also to feel safe and relaxed. Many people all around the world claim to feel alone most of the time but this happens ion most cases because today’s lifestyle can easily affect one’s social skills and even desire to bond. However, investing in what you have or just discovering the ones around you will bring you more benefits than just some time spent in front of the PC.

3. ALBATROSS

The albatross is a sea bird which is known to live as much as 50 years which is remarkable for a bird. But what is the most remarkable is the fact that these birds are monogamous which made them a symbol for sailors traveling far away.

Fidelity- a subject all like to joke about but few actually prefer to take it seriously. We’ve all heard stories from the tragic ones to the most hilarious but the reality behind them may not be as entertaining. Usually in these situations this is a sign that the couple has a serious problem which is definitely not solved the right way. Infidelity is a source of distress for everyone involved leading to negative psychological effects such as guilt, underestimating, frustration, lack of confidence in anyone, adaptation problems. It’s always been there and will probably never disappear. However, putting fidelity behind a glass and calling it unreachable is not where we want to be.

4. PUFFIN

Puffins are sea birds which lay their eggs on cliffs in order not to be eaten by predators. However, when the babies hatch they prepare for a long journey to the beach. When the time comes to follow their parents, they jump from a remarkable height, most of them arriving safe on the beach.

Courage- Desiring is human…but daring? Taking a decision, most of the times risky, is something many would not rather do. Asking for a raise, leaving home for a college abroad, talking about your feelings- not easy. But the torment of deciding what to do is nothing compared to the regret of missing a once in a lifetime opportunity because of fear. We hear of people who could have done so much and so well but were afraid, everyday. The ones who take the tough decisions are on the front page of the newspapers. So when you truly have a feeling that this may be the right decision, analyze the situation (making quick decisions without thinking is not the best thing to do) take a deep breath and go for it. It may be the right thing.

5. SALMON

Salmon

Salmons travel thousands and thousands of miles to get to the rivers they began their lives in. Many never reach their goal, but the ones who do offer the new generation the chance to make the same journey.

Perseverance- Once you’ve made the decision don’t give up on it immediately because of a reason or another! People giving up is a problem maybe not many take into consideration when they should. Many things, some very important remain unfinished just because giving up seems a very attractive alternative. Continuous effort is however the key in many cases as luck rarely strikes. Leaving behind the idea, value or impulse is what causes these things to happen. A few difficulties, some bad comments and it’s hard to go on. And still what if others gave up on their dreams or plans? Would the world still be the same now? Of course, being a Don Quixote is something totally undesirable. Be sure that it’s worth fighting for!

6. Wolf

Wolves are strong and resistant animals, being able to hunt various types of prey. However, a wolf knows that hunting in packs is the key towards reaching a bigger lunch. When hunting together, wolves can even kill a 500 kilo-moose, which is 10 times bigger than any of them and capable of putting tremendous fight.

Teamwork – Trusting your own powers and involving in various activities is something everyone is recommended to do. But only to rely on yourself may not be the best solution. More heads means more ideas. Of course, it’s normal to want to achieve glory and maximum of results by yourself; however, history was rarely changed by just a person, there were definitely others by his or her side. Jealousy can also be there. Still, working like this will show you that you cannot be the best at everything but that collective effort is the key to the problem. So, work with others to achieve a goal, share ideas, give a hand! The results will worth making a change. But teamwork is not just about work and school, it is about your spare time too: socialize, interact, be part of a group! What would sports be without it? Or how would any humanitarian action be successful? Maybe there is some truth in those old sayings…

7. Golden-fronted Bowerbird

One of the most impressing mating rituals belongs to a species of birds from the rain forest and concerns a special care for beauty, called the Golden-fronted Bowerbird. Every male builds some kind of presentation tent where he puts all the beautiful things he can find especially blue things and arranges them so that they will attract a female. The ladies come, analyze what they see and many times are not satisfied so that the males have to start working again until it’s perfect.

Beauty- it fascinates each and every one of us, we have to admit it. Finding and admiring the real beauty can be one of the most amazing things to do. The beauty is everywhere, in nature, in the people around us, in our homes. Becoming more attentive to details, having higher standards, improving the way you see the world is what you should do. Beauty is not a shallow value as long as it is appreciated correctly. Find the beauty around you and enjoy it, learn to smile at all the small things around you like a walk in the evening while the sun sets.

Animals react the way their instinct and senses dictate and still prove to be remarkable role models. Finding the right value in them and using it in real life is what makes people remarkable.

How to become a remarkable objective critical thinker, part 1, the why the what and the how

Due to the fact that modern life takes us so fast through so many different situations, it’s hard to even fully understand what’s even happening, let alone take into consideration all the information and sort it out to get to the right conclusion. Still, despite what you may think and despite it’s obvious utility, logic is not a friend of many, and really few understand just how much plain logic and objectivity can help you out in day to day life. It’s not a solution to all your problems, it’s not a magic ring, but it’s what should be done.

Credits

The modern man who gets what he wants pretty much all the time without cheating, lying and stealing is by definition a critical thinker, even though he may not realize it; your mind is working at all times, even when you sleep (actually, it’s believed that finding the answer to some problems which seem unsolvable could just arrive in your sleep). Life is all about the decisions you make, and when you make decisions what you basically do is look at what you should do, why you should do it and how you should do it; these are the steps to take if you want to become a critical thinker as well.

So what is critical thinking?? It’s the process of verifying the accuracy of the information you have and using it using your own effective personal set of criteria to get to the result which you want to achieve. It should be used in virtually all of the circumstances you will encounter in your life.

Credits

Still, what makes taking decisions so hard, at least most of the time, and especially the important ones ?? The main disadvantage is that it’s really tempting to think about your problem from the inside. This way you can’t really see the big picture, and you tend to neglect the negative aspects hoping they won’t happen. But closing your eyes doesn’t mean the others can you, it just means that you can’t see the others. You have to analyze your situation from many (if not all) perspectives, and only after that, by a process of deduction, get to the right conclusion and avoid the distractions.

Credits

Also, another thing that has to be understood is that thinking logically doesn’t limit your creativity, on the contrary. Many things you find unbearable could be turned into something really easy with a minimum effort and consideration of the things involved. It’s really hard if you can’t do it naturally, but it’s really easy once you see how to do it. That’s what the point of this series is, to help you find the critical objective thinker within you, and let him lead you towards solving your problems. It’s going to be in three parts: the why, the how and the what.

This is part 1 of Becoming a Remarkable Thinker
Parts 1, 2, 3, 4

How to become a remarkable objective critical thinker, part 2, the why

As I said in the prologue of this series, using your analytic critical abilities is very important for a man, no matter what he does and how he thinks; it’s something required by more than our society, it’s something required by our inner nature. But some people might find it hard to believe that, so here’s just some of the reasons why you should think and use logic to solve your problems.

You can’t estimate your position without being objective; sometimes it’s hard to understand exactly where you really are, whether it’s your job, your relationship or something else. It’s in the human nature to think about the best and put the bad things aside, but it’s important to really understand where you are, so you can prepare yourself for any obstacles which might appear in your way; and if it’s all good, than it’s all good.

Credits

Objectivity is a must for long term success; you can reach success on a whim, or by pure luck, but it’s the staying up that’s hard. It’s really hard to lose yourself once you achieve your goal, whether it’s your dream job or just the pretty girl that lives next door. One of the big secrets of life is to take nothing for granted and to understand that anything could go bad at any moment. For example, they might have hired you because they just didn’t have anybody else, or the girl might have been drunk that evening. That doesn’t mean that you can’t keep them; if you work hard and smart and treat the girl just right, you might keep both of them, but not without understanding where you stand.

Credits: that probably won’t be the girl next door

A critical mind can eliminate the unneeded, leaving just what you need for a great life; the process here is simple, you analyze your options and step by step reach the best one. How?? That’s easy. Let’s say you’ve got to decide where to go on your vacation (it is summer time, after all). You look at your options, and see if there’s anyone that just stands out, somewhere that you’ve always wanted to go and have the chance to do at this point. If so, that’s the choice for you. If not, you should eliminate those which are less apealing, by taking into consideration the factors which might influence your decision. Try to think about as many of these as possible, as this will greatly increase the accuracy of your decision making process. After you do this, repeat these steps again, until you reach the great vacation you’ve been dreaming of all year; somebody who would’ve decided on a whim without even thinking the least bit critical has every chance of getting a lousy vacation.

When the odds are against you, logic is what could tip the balance in your favor; this one’s easy too. If you see for example that you’re working on something and you can in no way finish in time, what do you do?? If it’s not done on time it’s worthless. Working continuously and hoping it will be enough will probably be not enough. Now is the time to stop and ponder your options; perhaps you’re not doing something right, perhaps there’s somebody that could help you, or perhaps you could cancel other projects. Find the right way so you can finish on time instead of brainlessly working ahead.

It’s a very good exercise for your mind; have you wondered why people solve logic problems, or just think about certain issues ?? Have you ever wondered why a student that has been seriously learning for several months for his tests uses his mind more effectively than usually?? Critical thinking is an essential process that cultivates and educates your mind, increasing your sense of reality and effectively making you smarter. It opens new doors in what concerns your understanding, as well as the circumstance and situation of your life.

“>Credits for this great pic: Nothing better than a workout

You could check for further info on adam sicinski’s blog; the man has absolutely great advice. So hopefully I’ve convinced you (at least a bit) that thinking is a really useful (no, really), but often underestimated method of solving your problems. But you have to think the right way, objective and critical, cause otherwise you would just do some more work in vain.

This is part 2 of Becoming a remarkable thinker
Parts 1, 2, 3, 4